Call/text me when you’re on your way. Potassium WTF? Auotcorrect get ya? Nope on the periodic table, the symbol for potassium is K. OMG you are such a nerd!
Archive for the ‘Auto Corrects’ Category
Your mom and I are going to divorce next month What??? why! call me please? I wrote Disney and this phone changed it. We are going to Disney
I look forward to the day when I’m not blowing minors everyday Uhhh blowing minors? My nose!! Omg! Lmao! I’m sick 🙁
Then I’m going to lick your ass out tonight wat….. i’m being serious uhm that is disgusting ok sorry I meant lock not lick ugh
I meant hug! haha im giving no one HIV good to know
happy halloween dad you dressing up nah im way too old to be answering the door in a cockring costume! what a bad autocorrect yikes dad big difference
ok. truth or dare truth All right.. have you ever cheated on me? I mean DARE. darn you autocorrect Alright.. I dare you to answer the question..
For christs sake, stop leaving the bloody tampon!!!! What?? WHERE?! Lmfao. The bloody lamp on, in the bathroom. Not the tampon. Laughing so hard. Can not breathe. Ohhhh my godddd. I was like WTF? I have my period so I was totally mortified. Lmao
Did you guys eat dinner yet? Yep. Just had pasta. Oh by the way, I laid the babysitter. Uh, excuse me? You fucking what????? Hahaha PAID. I paid her. Sorry to give you a heart attack babe. I hate you! lol
question. Sure what’s up? Have you ever fondled yourself? Uhh… googled not fondled! oh crap. that just made me look like the biggest perv Yes I have and yes it did! LOL
How is our pregnant little daughter? Mom. How did you know? I meant Perfect Wait WHAT!!!!
Hon my mom is coming over for the weekend 🙂 She’s a fucking cunt and I don’t want her anywhere near me or my house or my kids John! Sorry babe. Auto correct. I mean t great. Can’t wait. NOT FUNNY